Category Archives: Play

Good Party Questions

I’ve noticed a trend lately where people describe themselves as extroverted introverts. They love to meet new people and try new things, but what they love even more, they’ll tell you, is to simply stay home and curl up with a good book. I can understand the paradox, but I’ve seen this enough times now that I’m starting to think it’s an attempt to portray how well-rounded they are. And guess what – I’m jealous! I’m here to say I’m just a plain old extroverted extrovert. Which means not only do I love to meet and talk to new people, I’m also trying to get everyone else to talk. My introverted birds either flock toward me or… flit away…

Way back, in the times of Before (approx. 2019 A.D.), I loved being around friends and friends of friends and posing big questions and hearing people’s stories that you’d never hear unprompted. And probably like 2 years ago, I started thinking of these ramble-y, dreamy, silly, far-reaching, open-ended questions and started scribbling them down in the back of a notebook under the header “Good Party Questions.”

Here’s what I’ve got so far:

  1. What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?
  2. If you could know the day you were going to die, would you want to know?
  3. If you could suddenly have a different career tomorrow, what would you want to be?
  4. What’s a useless, unusual, or very specific talent that you have?
  5. What’s your best story ever?
  6. What’s the best present you’ve ever received?
  7. What’s a quote you really like?
  8. What’s something you’re waiting for?
  9. What’s a small dream you have?
  10. What’s one meal you’re really good at making?
  11. Who taught you how to drive?
  12. Who was the best boss you ever had?
  13. What was your favourite toy as a kid?
  14. What’s a song or book you wish you’d written?
  15. What’s a word you like or love to say that people should use more?
  16. What’s the best birthday you ever had?
  17. Who’s someone you go to for advice?
  18. If you could wake up in any place tomorrow, anywhere in the world, where would you want to wake up?
  19. What’s one piece of clothing you wish you still owned?
  20. What’s something you’ve changed your mind about?
  21. What’s one thing you believe to be true that no one else agrees with you on?
  22. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever witnessed?
  23. Describe a moment when you felt truly alive.
  24. What’s something that everyone else seems to know that you didn’t learn until later in life?
  25. What’s a saying you try to live by?
  26. What’s one thing you know you’ll never do?
  27. What’s your favourite quality you’ve inherited from a parent?
  28. Describe a time when you said the thing you wanted to say in the moment you wanted to say it.
  29. Describe a moment when you felt truly independent.
  30. What’s something you collect?
  31. Have you ever had an encounter with the supernatural?
  32. What’s the weirdest physical sensation you’ve ever felt?
  33. What’s the best party you’ve ever been to?
  34. When’s a time you made a good decision?
  35. What’s been your favourite age to be?
  36. What’s something you’ve quit?
  37. What did your room look like as a kid?

It’s disappointing when

the people you’re trying to live vicariously through on Instagram clearly don’t have much of a life either.

I always thought I had gif potential.

This is all I needed to prove I’m just as adorable as I always suspected.

 

I normally can’t stand it when

people say things like, “WHAT A YEAR!”

But seriously, what a year.

I’ve moved twice, went back to school, and got a new job. I now live right by Lake Ontario, I’m learning to be an ad copywriter, I write for my school newspaper, AND my bedroom wall looks like this:

Splatter paint wall

Feels good.

Things I’ve learned so far about moving out of my parents place,

and in with my boyfriend:

-the X-Box is not a table

-it’s easier to get into the apartment if you use the right key

-you have to pay for internet

I have a small dream:

To one day order all the appetizers at a restaurant or bar. Not some of the apps. ALL of the apps. Even the appetizer at the end of the list that’s a combination of all of the ones above it. I said ALL THE APPS.

The waiter’s gonna look at me. This has never happened before.

“I’m sorry,…did you say…ALL of the apps?”

And I’m gonna say,

“Did I stutter?”

I’m not even gonna order anything else. All the apps will be my meal. A super meal made up of lots of little tiny meals. It’ll be a monster meal.

Heading off the Jane bus,

I was about to walk past the guy sitting next to me when he looked straight at me and said:

“I’m gonna smack your ass.”

This is actually the exact scenario I fear most riding on the TTC- having my butt smacked by a stranger. I don’t know even why but I really am paranoid about that happening to me. And here was this stranger telling me that’s exactly what he was going to do. It was creepy on multiple levels, like he could read my mind. He had been acting erratically the whole bus ride though so this lewd statement coming out of his mouth wasn’t actually that shocking. I think what came out of mine was actually more surprising for the both of us:

“Don’t you fucking talk to me that way.”

10 points to Jess for being a badass!!! I couldn’t believe it. I said the exact thing I wanted to say in the moment I wanted to say it. That never happens!!!! I always thought that’d just be a distant dream for me- like having The Rock lift me over his head with one hand. Sure it’d be nice but…it’ll never happen. Except it did for me!!! My heart was pounding like crazy. It truly felt just as amazing as I always imagined it would. His reaction was pretty satisfying too:

“I’m sorry! Sorrysorrysorrysorrry!”

And I just walked off the bus, untouchable.

I’ve been quoted in a blog!

I’m famous!

http://weftagency.tumblr.com/post/116039084898/opinion-models-of-influence

You have to like scroll down to actually read what I wrote, but I mean, I think it’s totally worth it. I’m the first quote on the page so that has to count for something right?

I will never understand people who whine when

their white shoes get dirty. I don’t get how they don’t realize that their shoes traverse the ground all day, every day. That’s their job. To get dirty, to be dirty. If your shoes aren’t dirty, where are you going with your life? What are you doing? It can’t be a whole lot. I bet you’ve had very few experiences in those shoes. And if you have the time to worry about your shoes, then I know for sure you’re not having any fun. You’re being whipped by an inanimate object. Don’t be that person. Respect yourself, not the shit you ‘own’. Fuck up your shoes. You deserve it. Be better than clean shoes. No one ever did anything significant in clean white shoes.